Why English is Hard to Learn

There is no egg in eggplant, nor ham in hamburger; neither apple or pine in pineapple.

English muffins weren't invented in England, and French fries aren't French.

Sweetmeats are candies while sweetbreads, which aren't sweet, are meat.

Quicksand can work slowly, boxing rings are square, and a guinea pig is neither from Guinea, nor is it a pig.

And why is it that writers write, but fingers don't fing, grocers don't groce, and hammers don't ham?

If the plural of tooth is teeth, why isn't the plural of booth beeth?

One goose, two geese; so, one moose, two meese?

One index, two indices?

Doesn't it seem crazy that you can make amends, but not one amend?

If you have a bunch of odds and ends, and get rid of all but one of them, what do you call it?

If teachers taught, why didn't preachers praught?

If a vegetarian eats vegetables, what does a humanitarian eat?

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